Completely necessary Raiders beatdown

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Last week I saw an article saying the Raiders infamous “black hole” contingent hired a Public Relations firm to advise on how they could improve their image. That would be a punch line for a great joke, but this is true! Just in time for Raider week, someone has to issue the Raider beatdown and The Greg One is proud to do it! For this installment of our show i’ll wear the hat of Captain Obvious: Attorney-at-Law and give my top ten answers to the Raiders black hole query…

10. (After spitting Cappucino across expensive mahogany desk) Seriously???

9. Change the name. Nothing associated with the word HOLE has ever been positive.

8. Send the people back to Alcatraz where they came from! I’d say lose the entire criminal population but then you would have no fan base…

7. Lose the spiked shoulderpads, Mad Max was just a movie.

6. Write this down: Darth Vader goes to ComicCon, not Raider games. Ditch the masks before George Lucas sues your asses off!

5. The scores of grinning/sneering skulls and corpses…not exactly promoting a family atmosphere..

4. Lose the silver and black facepaint…you look like demented zebras.

3. One word…Rainbows.

2. STOP STABBING, BEATING AND TERRORIZING FANS OF OTHER TEAMS GENIUS!

1. How about trying a SMILE for a change?

What better game to get the second half of the season started right then by taking out frustrations on the Raiders! One more free suggestion Black Holers…maybe if your team WON more games you wouldn’t be so angry all the time! I believe over the last ten years the Washington Generals have won more games than you. Chargers win tomorrow night 34-13. Any comments to add to the list boltbeat?

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