Completely necessary Raiders beatdown


Last week I saw an article saying the Raiders infamous “black hole” contingent hired a Public Relations firm to advise on how they could improve their image. That would be a punch line for a great joke, but this is true! Just in time for Raider week, someone has to issue the Raider beatdown and The Greg One is proud to do it! For this installment of our show i’ll wear the hat of Captain Obvious: Attorney-at-Law and give my top ten answers to the Raiders black hole query…

10. (After spitting Cappucino across expensive mahogany desk) Seriously???

9. Change the name. Nothing associated with the word HOLE has ever been positive.

8. Send the people back to Alcatraz where they came from! I’d say lose the entire criminal population but then you would have no fan base…

7. Lose the spiked shoulderpads, Mad Max was just a movie.

6. Write this down: Darth Vader goes to ComicCon, not Raider games. Ditch the masks before George Lucas sues your asses off!

5. The scores of grinning/sneering skulls and corpses…not exactly promoting a family atmosphere..

4. Lose the silver and black facepaint…you look like demented zebras.

3. One word…Rainbows.

2. STOP STABBING, BEATING AND TERRORIZING FANS OF OTHER TEAMS GENIUS!

1. How about trying a SMILE for a change?

What better game to get the second half of the season started right then by taking out frustrations on the Raiders! One more free suggestion Black Holers…maybe if your team WON more games you wouldn’t be so angry all the time! I believe over the last ten years the Washington Generals have won more games than you. Chargers win tomorrow night 34-13. Any comments to add to the list boltbeat?

  • Rachel Hicks

    I had a similar conversation with a Raiders fan on the bus yesterday (yeah they’ve invaded Denver too). I basically told him that i realized they are “SAD” after getting shut out by the Chiefs, then doing whatever they did on their bye week, only to get beat down by the Broncos-IN OAKLAND! I suggested just sleeping thru the game tomorrow night because after all they can always blame the loss on the NFL scheduling the games too close together.

  • Edmart67

    About now you’re wishing you hadn’t written this article. Funny the way it is when you think about it: will the chargers ever beat the raiders at home again? Funny the way it is: the last 2 stabbings at Qualcomm have been by disgusted charger fans. Oh, and just funny: keep your rainbows, keep your pansy fight song, keep your hatred I sports to yourself. The Black Hole will always be, so get over it. Our Beloved Al Davis’spirit rests there. Don’t mess with it! Try again next year pansy.

  • LordOfTheGregs

    Easy for you to say NOW. Where were you BEFORE the game. Write your smack before the outcome is decided then come brag on it! I stand by everything I write and stand for this piece even now and always will. You will get another chance because there will be another Raider beatdown the week of the next game. Try not to knife anyone between now and then so you can come back and post you smack BEFORE kickoff if you can stay out of the pen that long!